Response 1, Week 1

Response to Christine's Free Entry, January 19

I agree with Mackenzie’s discrepancy with the word “overzealously”. Such a long word with a prominent (and harsh) “z” sound clashes with the preceding poem and left me stylistically confused. Another instance I want to pick with is the phrase “crouched with half-bored classmates”. Crouching seems to imply interest, intentness; it serves to get closer and involves a higher focus in stabilizing the muscles. As far as “half-bored” goes, I feel it is not as strong of a descriptive word as could be there. However, the imagery of this piece is particularly specific and vivid. In just the first stanza, we are introduced to a narrator, classmates, teacher, mother, ex-husband, and ex-mother-in-law. Both of the class projects are detailed in a way that I can easily picture.